Are you the type of person who is always thinking? Is it impossible to stay focused on something without voices chattering inside your head? You are in meeting with your colleagues and suddenly you think , “Do I need to buy a cucumber for dinner?”. There’s no link to the business you are about to negotiate and a cucumber, but your “Monkey-mind” doesn’t care or stop. It’s time to say “No! You will stay calm because you are under my control”
Take a look inside your brain
There are many people in your head. Take time to get to know them. Let me introduce you to the closest family members you never knew you had. At your right, you can see the Judge. He has a strong sense of justice. After each thing you do, he will check your book of beliefs and personal laws and tell you what is good, bad, wrong, true, normal or not. Sitting close to him is your Ego. The ego is acting like a snake that is really hungry. What is the ego hungry for? Status, rewards and expectations. Look behind the sofa and there is a shy doe. Her main activity is a strong memory. When you try to do something new, she will remind you of all the reasons you must not do it. This doe is full of fear and afraid of everything. “Oh no stop! Johnny is going to break everything!” Finally, there’s your monkey-mind that jumps between the past and the future. I tried to catch him, without success.
Like 5 fingers of your hand
The Judge, Ego-Snake, Afraid-Doe, Monkey-Jumper and you. Yes, and you because you are not your mind. You need to play your role. You are the spectator at the Cinema. You are in front of a really messy movie. The judge says “It’s not good for you to eat that pop-corn”. The ego replies “You deserve a better meal”. The doe says, “It will be hard to loss all those calories”. The Monkey says, “Should I subscribe to the gym again?”. You can’t fight them because they are members of your family. Instead, I suggest you to listen them and treat each voice as an adviser but not necessarily the truth. Each member of your family is playing their role. None of them have the ability to see the whole picture like you do. You are the observer of this show.
Your new career
As you have probably already guessed, this family need a good psychologist. Each member is different and needs to be treated specially. If you listen carefully to the judge you will understand your book of law and rules. This book probably needs an update because it was created during your childhood. Please give him this tip for me “There is no fact, only point of view”. The Ego-Snake lives in an artificial paradise where he remembers all things you have already achieved in your life. (Mostly about how you define yourself). He is a real competitor. He wants to defend all his titles (Status, beliefs) and win another. His most important problem comes from his attachment to trophies. When he thinks someone wants to attack his titles, he reacts brutally. You can tell the ego-snake “All those trophies are fake. They have no value because they don’t define who you really are. People really only value their own trophies. Nobody wants to take your. Don’t take things personally”.
Bananas and whispering
The shy doe will be probably be stuck in the waiting room in front of your cabinet. Give her a hug, Take her aside and whisper “Don’t worry. The future is not the past. You can’t predict what will happens but if you think something wrong will happen, obviously you will create this reality”. Finally, you can attract your monkey-mind with delicious bananas on the table. When the present is attractive, he doesn’t want to jump everywhere. Similarly, if you choose the life you want, you won’t need to go in an imaginary fairytale.
Do your best in each situation. Give your best, not less (Regrets) or not more (You will lose too much energy). Your best is enough. You will avoid lot of self-depreciation and problems. Take care of you and your new family. Hari Om!